Kick Ass | Mel Robbins | Summary


Book | 150 PDF SummariesCourse | YouTube | Coaching

Spotify | Instagram | Facebook | Newsletter | Book Club | Website

Kick Ass with Mel Robbins: Life-Changing Advice from the Author of “The 5 Second Rule” Audible Audiobook

Session #1:

She doesn’t believe that people figure out what brings them joy because they have an epiphany

People figure out what brings them joy because they force themselves to follow their curiosity, to try, to learn


Quitting. We all have ways of quitting when things get hard or when we just don’t feel motivated to push ourselves

Identifying negative patterns as a form of quitting is a powerful step that’s going to help you stop these patterns

Addiction. Addictions are just forms of habit dysfunctions

What makes it hard is that there is so much emotion tied up in the things that we do that are destructive

All habits have a trigger and a behavior pattern that you repeat

If-Then Planning Strategy”: Make a plan for what you will be doing for every one of these triggers instead of the addiction

Childhood strategies. We’ve all develop strategies when we were kids in order to deal with the situations that were upsetting or abusive

Session #2: Marcus, former NFL player

Become yourself and fully own it

For the rest of your life, be on the hunt for where you are trying to be someone you’re not. Be on the hunt for where insecurity is taking you out of your lane


Be on the hunt for wherever you are not owning your unique story

Your real power is in telling your story

Your credentials may help when you’re starting out, but over time your power is never in your credentials

It’s in you: your story, your instincts, and the unique things you bring to the table

The power of time travel

Travel forward two yearsenvision where you want to be, and then list out all of the thinking and behavior patterns that you’ve changed

Bring that all back to the present day and start shifting your thinking and behavior now to align with the patterns from the future you

Ask yourself: what in my life came easy or energized me?

That’s where you start if you don’t know what direction to head in


Book | 150 PDF SummariesCourse | YouTube | Coaching

Spotify | Instagram | Facebook | Newsletter | Book Club | Website

Session #3: Jessie, who struggles to lose weight


The secret to improving your relationship with anybody:

Take the focus off of you and put it on everyone else

How? Start cheering for people

If you have a problem that you have been trying to fix forever and you’re not making any progress like Jessie and her weight loss, maybe you don’t have any interest in fixing it at all

Maybe it’s not a problem and you’re really just using it as an excuse to not take responsibility

To make change simple and fun, one tool is naming the old chapter that you’re stuck in versus the new chapter that you want to step into

Session #4: Evelyn, trouble with procrastination


Procrastination has nothing to do with your ability to get things done, it’s just a form of stress relief

You have to understand that stress is the problem and you have to get to the root

The power of focusing on what happened rather than on what’s wrong with you

Session #5: Steven, paralyzed by what other people think

When you live fully open in your truth, if people react negatively, it’s their bullshit (responsibility/ fault)


Ask yourself: are there patterns that you learned from the adults in your childhood that you’re still repeating that doesn’t work for you?

Seeing the destructive behavior as a pattern is the first step to owning it and ultimately ending it

A tool you can use to destroy the pattern, “shut up Sharon”

Exaggerate and make the negative things you say to yourself into a character

When you turn old behaviors into a caricature, you actually remove your emotion and drama and heaviness around it, and it makes the behavior more objective

It’ll help you not only identify the old behaviors but to also move into the new behaviors more quickly

Manipulation. If you live your life in a way where you avoid upsetting people at all cost so you keep quiet, that’s a form of manipulation

If you hate confrontation so you don’t tell the truth about how you’re feeling, that’s a form of manipulation

When you manipulate people, you are responsible when they get upset if they find out the truth

But if you have the courage to say what you’re feeling or to tell them what’s true for you, when they get upset or they react negatively, it’s on them

Having the courage and the clarity to just be yourself, that’s what it means to be truly fabulous


Book | 150 PDF SummariesCourse | YouTube | Coaching

Spotify | Instagram | Facebook | Newsletter | Book Club | Website

Session #6: Kyle, bent on finding love, growing his business, and making a difference in people’s lives


If you were somebody that’s trying hard but you feel like you’re just not making any headway, she guarantees there something you cannot see or are refusing to see

We need to slow down and tune in to the emotions that are in there. In order to see the problem, you’re going to have to slow down

Any single, destructive habit that you have, it is also a mask for pain

Embrace and be proud of where you are at right now

The moment you take responsibility for your past, that’s really important

But it is also essential that you take pride in how far you’ve come

You’ll gain freedom and control back in your life the second you start feeling proud of where you are

Session #7: Terra, looking for love for 40 years


All relationships are the same, friendships, work relationships, with your family, your lover

We’re all the same because we all want the same thing

We all want to know that we matter

When you make people feel like they matter, you will win in any relationship

In the area of your life where you are being your best self, in those relationships, that’s what we’re going to use to help you change how you’re behaving in the cruddy relationship

All you have to do is adopt that best-self character everywhere

You need to intentionally take a moment and switch gears into the best-self person you want to be in that relationship

Assume good intent. When the people in your life piss you off and you feel frustrated, before you snap, assume good intent

Power versus connection. This is the only thing that you ever need to know about relationships

You’re either craving power or you’re craving connection at any moment.

The only relationships that are truly satisfying that go the distance are ones where both crave connection

Session #8: Ashlyn, struggling with self-acceptance and self-love


You can love someone and still be angry at them

You can be afraid of disappointing somebody and still make requests of them

Be honest about where in your life you feel numb because that’s where the roots are

Ask yourself: where is your kid or any child in your life completely checked outWhere are you missing potential signs?

The idea of celebration

Celebration is critical for a healthy life

Transparency. You won’t be able to kick ass until you own your story

When you own your story, that’s where all the power lies

It’s only when you’re transparent about your past that you have the power to own and change the future



Book | 150 PDF SummariesCourse | YouTube | Coaching

Spotify | Instagram | Facebook | Newsletter | Book Club | Website

Leave a Reply

Scroll to top